now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
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