her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
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