Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Randomize
