It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
