The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
