she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
Randomize
