Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize
