what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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