Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Randomize
