i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
What's wrong?
Long week. Sore muscles. Bad back. Hangover. Mini-keg. Crazy ex-wife. Unavailable love-interest. Dead celebrity families. Republicans.
Pussy.
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Randomize
