Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
Where did you get a picture of my penis
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
Randomize
