oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
I need to sanitize my soul.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Randomize
