Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
It is 3am. I'm at a pizzeria with my 4 friends. The one to my right is throwing up on herself, the one to my left is crying hysterically by herself, the one in front of me is passed out on the table, and the other is trying to find a taxi and I'm pretty sure a guy is sticking his hand up her skirt. Tourists are taking pictures. Help me.
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
Randomize
