There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
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