just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
It was confusing and full of hummus
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Randomize
