The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
