I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
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