So drunk, too bad you don't want this
you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
Good news!! I can adult!! π turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ππ
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
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