I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
I would ride that face into the sunset
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
Randomize
