I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize