Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize
