she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
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