um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Randomize
