North Korea, Best Korea!
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
