THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
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