She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
we can add 'stealing hydrangeas from the sign in front of the credit union because we're too poor to have all of the flower arrangements professionally done' to my list of maybe-felonies
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize
