I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
They took my balls.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
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