id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
Randomize
