I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize
