I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
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