i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
where are you?
Hypothermia
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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