doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
I just googled if crying burns calories
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
Pants are for mortals
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
Randomize
