i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
