Telling her that my penis is called megatron was not a good idea for a first date.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
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