he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
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Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
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you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
You brought string cheese to the strip club
I am never drinking with the goths again.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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