She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
Randomize
