i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
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