For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Randomize
