let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Randomize
