I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
Randomize