We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
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I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
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Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
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