You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
Randomize
