hotel room ftw
fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Randomize
