Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
It's blow job season.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
I feel like a drive thru vagina
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
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