And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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