i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
Randomize
