Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize
