hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize