When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
You know, be my cock's hype man.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
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