do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
