been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
Less talking, more tequila
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
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