Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
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